Reading the last post before my long pause where I mentioned the album title 'Stumble into Grace'. I am one of those people who constantly write and revise a soundtrack to my humble existence, editing in my head and occasionally creating a disc of the songs that move and inspire me at any given time. Going back to them is a little like reliving the times on a wee home movie in my head.

Song of this week, one in which I have had more than my fair share of 'have I done the right thing?' moments (whilst accepting that it is impossible to ever know..) is by the very lovely Tift Merritt, who I have seen perform live twice in Edinburgh's Queens Hall. The fact that I blubbed at both gigs tells you that her songs are some of those that seem to speak directly to me in a way that songs do. One of the reasons I love music so much is that elusive but awesome moment when exactly the right track appears just when you need it - for inspiration, reassurance or to match the exuberance that is bubbling up inside. 'Engine to turn', my current soundtrack fave, is echoing in my ears...

'Sometimes there's a choir in my head

Singing at the top of their voice -

They're singing

"Don't - look - back

Don't - be - scared!"

Ahhh, see now you understand.... Also still listening to John Grant's 'Queen of Denmark', one of those albums that seems to attach itself to me like a clingy child and demand playing constantly; maybe not everyone will be moved by it as I am, but I can listen again and again....

Always being one to look for portents and signs, I am pleased to report the first flowering of my Wysteria; one of the plants I have always coveted in the gardens of people who have beautiful gardens. Mine is a white version, rather than the more usual purpley violet, and it nearly died the year we abandoned it and ran off to Arran to sell fish for a summer season. Rewarded this spring for my nurturing over the last two winters with the most optimistic and romantic of flowers; hoping to see a full cascade over time.

Thinking of Montmartre again in terms of a new painting; thinking elephants too, so we will see where this one leads. I am taking on too much as usual; still got miles to go on the 'big wall' at Bon Papillon, which I am muralling in a (hopefully) fairly quiet, neutrally shaded Parisian cafe scene. Still, I wouldn't be me if I wasn't already letting my mind wander into fresh avenues.... must mean I am starting to relax again at last.